Saturday, 22 October 2011
I've just put a colour in my hair and I'm watching Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares on 4OD. I might get off my arse and make a cup of tea....or not!
I am so used to catering for everyone elses needs that when I get a day like today, I can't quite believe it.
I'll run a bath, maybe. Or pluck my eyebrows, maybe! Or I might just continue to sit here, DOING NOTHING!!
Monday, 12 September 2011
Get cat to the vets;
Practice sad face in the mirror just in case vet says it terminal.
Find the funding bid started in July for Befriending project on one of 24 frikkin data sticks I have on the go;
Finish re-writing the twice already re-written and very much overdue report for a charity that funds one of my projects;
Write and deliver induction for two new student social workers, who start tomorrow...who I have known about for, erm, three months, and, actually thinking about it ....I might have something saved on on of the aformentioned 24 data sticks....
Finish painting front room...went for a Swedish off white look...got the set from Willy Wonka's chocolate factory...remember the scene where Mike TV was sent as a TV signal? Well it's a bit brighter that that...cat has snow blindness and have to keep curtains closed. Hmmm.
Plan boyfriends 50th drinks – 3 week and counting; He is trying to ignore the upcoming big 50. Men, so vain. He thinks he is low maintaince. I explained that he is actually high maintainance, I just do all the boring (essential) stuff for him. Apart from chew his food, that is, though once he starts to loose the teeth.......
Phone my mother; She complained to my sister that the phone was on the blink and she couldn't hear it ring or indeed, when she answered, anyone talking.....and she has now admitted that, having had a flash all singing (ringing!) one paid for by my sister...it's actually my mother, not the phone. She is just completely deaf. Maybe a hearing dog...??
Bring in car for service following disaster on M40 when head gasket went;
Upgrade my AA account to include EVERYTHING that might happen on the M40 in a 10 yr old Peugeot with 100,000 miles on the clock;
Book and pay for driving lessons for darling daughter; SO SHE CAN DRIVE AWAY AND AND NOT BE IN MY FACE MOANING.
Try and find the letter from he dentist with darling daughter’s appointment date; Extract cracked retainers from behind her chest of drawers so she can at least pretend she has worn them. She'd be fekkin dead if I'd had to pay for all that work on her teeth...that she is rotting every weekend with CHERRY LAMBRINI!!!!
Help darling daughter to finish personal statement for uni; One very far away..LOl...no, I REALLY want her to live at home!!
Get the crap that’s been sitting in black bin liners for weeks in the spare room to the dump;
Sort out the cupboard under the stairs and remove the crap that came from the spare room to make room for said bin liners;
Book birthday treat for lovely boyfriend – he wants to go skiing or spend a week in Argentina over New Year;
Have a proper discussion with lovely boyfriend as to what constitutes a treat and how I do not want to go to Argentina for a week;
Buy fabric for baby quilt for nieces impending delivery;
Get sewing machine back off daughters friend so I can start said quilt;
Sort out the internet connection;
Return plug to those nice people at Belkin as they sent the wrong size for the ancient router we have;
Pay Orange dongle bill £117 - feck! No more Great British Bake Off on iPlayer for me!
Look for letter from orange re the bill in the recycling;
Sort out household paperwork, erm, actually look at what I'm putting into the green box....
Find the chunk of flashing that fell off the roof three months ago into the garden;
Check roof is not leaking – actually go into the loft, not just talk about it or stand outside looking up at the roof;
Get the courage up to check how much (little) is in my current account;
Tell ex hub I don’t want him to have his access visits in my house any more and that the kids will go to him instead; So he can mess up his own kitchen and NOT LOAD HIS OWN FEKKIN DISHWASHER.. not that this winds me up at all....hrrrmph. Oh and that they will be there overnight....hmmm! That'll put a halt to his gallop!
Tell kids that they will be going to dads on Tuesdays; Overnight! Wayhey!
Go back to slimming world to try and loose the weight I’ve gained since not going for 4 weeks; The Great British Bake Off HAS NOT HELPED IN ANYWAY HERE.
Sort out new school shoes for daughter;
Tell daughter she is grounded for being so rude to me about said shoes;
Check if there is any change from the £40 I gave darling daughter to buy shoes today;
And it’s only Monday….what’s on your mind??
Friday, 26 August 2011
As I type this my son, his dad, my darling daughter and her boyfriend are messing about in my front room with his new drum kit. As you might have gleaned from earlier blog posts, I can't stand my ex-hub and his lazy ways and am much happier now than when I was married......hmmm....however, I liked being married. I liked that the kids had a mum AND a dad who lived together in the same house. I like being a Mrs. Even thought I didn't like the Mr very much in the end....
As we got ready to leave for the wedding,I remember my dad saying, as we both downed a quick gin before we left the house, that it wasn't too late and that I didn't have to get married.
Maybe he knew that we wouldn't last and that the man I was about to marry would eventually let me down and leave me bereft.....
So zap forwards 16 years and my ex-hub sits in my front room. He has has three, maybe more, relationships since he divorced me. He still lives with his dad, sleeping in his teenage bedroom. I paid him loads of cash to get his name off the house so I didn't have any other ties to him other than the children. God knows what he has done with the cash, clearly not spent to help him properly move on.
I know he regrets the divorce and he too liked being married. Just not to me...He mopes about and now and again the bitterness he feels about the situation he created comes through. Me? I, like millions of women before me, picked myself up off the floor, carried on with caring for the kids, working, paying the morgage and just bloody well got on with life.
I love my life now, and the lovely man who gave me back my sense of self 7 years ago.
So, I do feel sad and I suppose that's ok as I did love him once and the life we had. I just feel anger at him now for what he did and how he destroyed our happy family. And he knows what he did - I don't need to remind him.
Sunday, 30 January 2011
I've always worked. It never even crossed my mind to give up work and sign on as a lone parent when ex-hub buggered off. I've worked full time since I was 17. Nearly 30 years! Maybe I deserve a break? However, it would've been nice to have had a say in when I took a break...and for how long....! In fact I am the type of person this government loves - active in the community, a supportive parent who puts great emphasis on my kids doing well at school, a tax payer and a hard worker! Jeepers Mr O, I'm doing my part of the deal - what about you??
So being Miss Practical, I'm just going to get stuck in and look at what I can do to get myself another job, or at the very least check just what I'm entitled to from the state I've paid into for 30 years and up to now have never claimed anything off.....
I will keep you all posted via the blog....and if you are reading this Mr O.....two fingers to you and all your toff cronies. Grrrrr!
Sunday, 2 January 2011
Well zip on 25 years and I see the same expression on my darling daughters face. An expression I could cheerfully smack off said teen's face. However, as a, (yest my cheeks burn red when I use this title) Parenting Professional, I know that this is not the correct response. What is the correct response to a 17 year old lazy bones who spends all of her time on Facebook, BBMing, watching shite on Living TV, while NOT revising for her first AS level exam in January or actually doing anything meaningful?
She had a major strop lasting TWO DAYS when I said that her boyfriend could stay over on NYE, but he had to sleep in her brother's room. OMG. Lots of abuse and 'everyone elses parents allow them to sleep with their boyfriends' at 90 decibels, with tears. My useless ex-hub couldn't see what my problem was (see previous posts..) but 'hey,it's your house so I guess it's your rules'. Too fekking right you useless fecker! (and what did he do with the £30k I gave him to get his name off the house????? - NOTHING! He still live with his dad so he doesn't have a house to have rules in....HARRUMPH.)
I love my children, I do honest, your Honour, but the last two weeks have stretched my coping ability to and indeed beyond it's elastic limit. The final straw came this morning, when after an evening of sulking and general moodiness, my daughter said in that feeble girlie voice which to me is like fingernails down a blackboard, that maybe a haircut might cheer her up. A haircut. A fekkin' HAIRCUT. Now not a Supercuts special, but a full blown Tony and Guy.
This is the child who got Uggs for Christmas, along with over £200 of other stuff, mostly from Topshop. This is the child who does NO CHORES, does not work, or indeed contribute anything into the household, save a big dollop of stress and moodiness.
I know it's my fault - she is a creature created by me and I've let her away with bloody murder. I know I've overcompensated for the divorce and being a working mum, but. purleeeze, give me a break! I was only doing my best, by bloody doing everything and not asking the kids to do anything in return.
I know there are thousands of women out there like me - running around like blue arsed flies, trying to keep every one happy, warm and well fed. I know every year that I say 'no more, this worm has turned..' but it has only rolled over to accommodate another worm who now needs looking after. God! Here's to 2011. I'm now off to hide in the car and read the papers to get out of the sulky ones space. Phone off, R4 on. Only wish I had tinted windows so no-one could see me!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!