Monday, 14 December 2009

Teenagers # 2 and rats under the floorboards

My darling daughter was 16 last week. In addition to a birthday meal at Pizza Express - £115, my mother sent her £50 and I gave her £100, along with two Topshop vouchers from my friends for £ a trip to the cinema for 8 friends costing £60 ....
Now, in my book, that seems like a pretty good deal, for a 16 year old.....not in her books I'm afraid.

She was 'annoyed' (!) that she had only £100 to spend from me as she thought it was 'gonna be £200', God spare me, but in my book, she should've been delighted....I spend less on my weekly shop in Tesco for God's sake!!

In addition to the above, several of her friends stayed over on saturday night after the flicks. She had a fit when I insisted that the boys slept downstairs and the girls upstairs. In fact she had a complete strop and hissy fit about this. When, at 1am I asked (!) the kids to settle down and go to sleep, she went mad (quietly - hissing at me through clenched train tracks...) and refused to switch off the video thing in her room.

Holy God, what have I raised? Her behaviour is outrageous - I would never have behaved like this to my mum. Am I such a useless mother that she thinks it's ok to behave like this? Now, there was no drugs, or booze or sex or really bad behaviour at the weekend, but should I be grateful for this and ignore her disrespectful behaviour?

One of her friends mothers rang me before the sleepover to check all was ok and that they we actually going to be at my house. To be honest I was astounded that one of the parents had actually phoned - I do as a matter of course, but to date just one other mum has called me to check the arrangments for a sleepover. Her daugher is as horrible as mine - and I'm ashamed to tell you all but both me and this other mum hid in our wardrobes, doors shut to chat as our darling daughters were on Stasi patrol listening to our conversation!!!

I used to read that teenagers column in the Guardian and think - ha, what a useless lefty liberal mother, unable to manage her kids and allowing them to walk all over her. Hmm, well that smug attitude has come back to bite me on the arse!!

Anyhow, her dad has been great and has agreed with me that she is grounded till Christmas eve.
He is coming over tomorrow night to talk to her (!) and set out some very basic expectations around her behaviour.

I am so depressed about this! I work full time and have another younger child ...God I am so feeble! To be honest I am so pissed off with her I am very afraid that if I loose it with her, I won't be able to stop and it will really end in tears.

I usually try and find the funny side of life, but living with a teenage girl has defeated my funny bone.....

Oh, and to cap all that I've got a rat, and it's (them! eurrrgh!!) scrabbling about under my floor and in the blocked up chimney breast in my kitchen. I've put poison down ( forget humane killing - they are fekkin vermin) and blocked up all the holes.

Hmm,horrible teenagers or scrabbley rats...hard choice really.not sure which is worse!This might send me over the edge....but in the meantime ...bring on the merlot....!


Elaine said...

You are not alone. But as mother of a 20 year old I can vouch that it does get better.
I promise.

Brighton Mum-Teenage Angst said...

Oooh! You are definitely not alone with this one. When did you sneak into my house and spy on my 16yr daughter?? Exactly the same. With you on the grounding, absolutely. And I'm sure you'll have to put up with serious attitude & tantrums over it, so stay strong! It will be worth it in the long run. Were we this ungrateful at this age?? I can't remember, but I honestly don't think so.

auntiegwen said...

Come to me, I have wine

and empathy

and wine

and chocolate

and wine


Dulwichmum said...

You poor thing. I am not looking forward to teenagers. Babies are so difficult, but I don't think it can be as teenagers. I like Auntiegwen's suggestion, I hope you took her up on it.

Best wishes,


Looking Fab in your forties said...

My 17 year old had £150 spent on her on clothes from a local boutique and then I bought her a lace top she wanted from Oasis on Saturday and still she talks to me like shit, yet looks like butter wouldn't melt and refuses to clear up her room before Xmas! Thanks for stopping by my blog xx

what happened ?how did i get HERE? said...

Oh dear! What are we to do with these HORRIBLE teenage girls?! Thank you all for your comments and hooray for merlot I say!!
Yesterday eveing, my darling daughter on hearing that I was going to Tony and Guy today and, heavens, spending a whole £90 on a cut and colour had another, albeit, mini strop about how SHE needed her hair cut...and how she NEVER (sob!) has her hair done in T&G....and how can I expect her to go to Supercuts in the high street 'with all the chavs!!!!???'
And, I must say, have had this colour done as a special treat to myself as I spent all my fekkin money this year on the KIDS!! I'll just offer it up, yet again, to the Holy Ghost! Mxx

Mrs Worthington said...

I feel your pain. Alcohol helps. I have developed a thicker skin to stop them pushing my buttons but sometimes they just hit that button a wee bit too hard....

Anonymous said...